Saturday, August 17, 2002

Being bored is a major factor in most of the successes and failures I have experienced in my life. And now, boredom has paved the way for yet another new venture, the BLOG! My life has been full of exciting "NEW" ways to complete myself. Most have lived short lives, others have looked like keepers only to fade into the sunset, and then there are those that surface and resurface like old friends in times of need. Writing has always been my faithful friend in times of need, as well as times of joy and success. It's been a while since I've looked her up and left her out. She's a bit dusty, maybe more like rusty. Used to be I needed a cross or a lead to bring her to life, now I just feel her come to life beneath my finger tips as she flows a steady stream of energy, emotion, toil, turmoil, intellect, confusion, strife -- now my lifeblood flows from my being to strategically placed plastic pads which take life on a lighted screen. The most solitary yet most effective way I know to communcate, but it goes beyond that. I could never create the things she brings with my lips or voice, it never works that way for me. I need the solitude and the oneness to bring her to life, she my majical, beautiful, wonderful friend from within, who startles me at times with revelations I didn't know I even knew, with answers that I thought were never there, and with words that are sometimes musical and metaphorical at the same time. Oh, there are those times when she does get stuck and she is awkward and sublime, but I understand and am patient, she just needs to sleep a while, but not for too long. If I put her away for too long I lose touch with something inside. My inner voice takes life through her and sometimes I forget that. If I put her away for too long I find myself becoming imbalanced and out of kilter, not knowing where I am or where I am going. So I have finally brought her back again, after too long a slumber to help me find my way again. As she has slept I have lost myself. Why didn't I know that all I needed to do was to wake her up? Welcome back dear friend, I need you once again, perhaps now more than ever before.